John Songbird" McCain - A Doddering, Petulant Fart

Oh, "Canary Boy"...I'm reasonably sure that you'll put on a manhunt to try and find me, if by some amazing sleight-of-hand you attain the office of the President Of The United States...of course, I might shit me the keys to Heaven, but I don't think that's too likely, eh?

That's my nod to Garth Ennis, who created Preacher with Steeldrivin' Steve Dillon, and never called me (Steve - love that headshot of John Constantine in between Black Death chain smokes).

I missed comic book GOLD.

That italicized line belongs wholly to Garth, and I do have a copy of Preacher #1; just not a first printing.

Before I get into my Garth Ennis love-fest, let's get back to the corpse-who-would-be-pResident:

Your fellow POWs hate your guts;
you sell out veterans on a daily basis;
you think that "gooks" is cool to say;
your rendition of "Barbara Ann" with the lyrics, "Bomb, Bomb Iran" was FUCKING STUPID;
I predict that your running mate will be Mitt "Helmet-Head" Romney, thereby cementing the TRUE ELITIST in the current campaign;
but most of all...you think that being an angry old coot is excusable.

Do us all a favor, and get in the coffin now.

Okay...heard about the woman who was molested and almost strip-searched at JetBlue terminal?

Maybe they thought she was carrying two huge bombs on her chest!

Haw!

Have any of you read The Boys? It's a comic book produced by Dynamite Entertainment, written by the aforementioned Garth Ennis, and drawn by Darick Robertson, formerly of the magnificent Transmetropoitan, written by Warren Ellis.

Come to think of it...he didn't inform me either...odd.

Issue #21 came out, and it's a doozy. Basically, the tale is of a botched attempt at a hijacking gone completely bonzo by the addition of poorly-trained superheroes.

I've already ruined the story by telling you that...but I can't help but to notice the weird parallels to the events of September 11th, 2001.

The last page says it all.

So, please understand this: I AM the guy who will crow, "I TOLD YOU SO...NYAH, NYAH...", but that isn't WHY I say what I do. I say it because it's the TRUTH. Your actions, however noble, also need to be fueled by TRUTH, or...well, read this book - you'll see what's gained from non-noble intentions.

Garth...a pint of Guinnes on me if I ever run into you at a convention...and I can guarantee you I'll not have gone to the bogs and left a floater anywhere around...